Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Tidbits *EDITED*

First, thanks to everyone for listening to, and commenting on my rant below. Haze made a really good point that she sees people being nice more often and I wanted to add that I do actually see people being nice - random people have helped put groceries into the car and people often stop to smile at Micah and tell him how cute he is. So, there are good people out there. I was in a bad mood and so for a minute I was focusing on the negative. Thanks Haze for reminding me to look for the positive.

Did you know that Micah can do the splits? Seriously. Full-on-out splits. (Is this normal?) It's hilarious. Last night we were getting ready for bath and we spent about 15 minutes watching him play with a lid to a baby food jar (we're so fancy with our toys). He was doing the splits the entire time! I would have taken pictures to share, but, umm, we were getting ready for bath so he was nekkid. The party ended when he peed on the floor while doing the splits. (that made both of us crack up laughing and he sat there confused - into the bath you go!)
I have to admit that was the first time in the past few days that he's laughed and played for a longer period of time. I think all of those teeth must be bothering him because he has been a serious crab-ball lately! Poor child crabs from when he wakes up from afternoon nap all the way til bedtime. I hope it's just his teeth - of course, I worry that he's sick, but he seems to be fine.

This morning we went downstairs to play (and fold laundry - fun!) and I noticed something looked different downstairs. It honestly took me a minute to realize that it was SUNLIGHT! The sun was streaming through the windows and it's been so long since we've seen the sun that it confused me at first. It also made for terrible naps today. I really need to get room-darkening curtains. Really.

Micah's new favorite thing is for me to fill a basket with books and then he proceeds to take them all out and look at them. His Parent Educator was really impressed that he can turn the pages all by himself. She was also impressed that he was doing things that are on a level for 13 months - he's a genius. Anyway, here are some pictures of my little bookworm...

*I am adding to this post something I have been sad about for the past week because I have to get it out. I haven't been sure how to talk about it, so instead I've posted about random stuff, but I just finished re-reading There is No Me Without You and the last chapter touched me deeply. Remember when Mikki & Ryan, the adoptive parents of Mekdes & Yabsira, go to visit their children's grandfather? Remember that a spontaneous second funeral took place at the children's parents grave site. Ryan spoke to the group assembled: "We will love them and take care of them forever... We will always stay in touch with you."

The first time I read this I was filled with hope - hope that I could meet Micah's first mom and send letters throughout the years to let her know he was doing well. Hope that we could meet again someday- either if we went back for another adoption, or when we go back to Ethiopia with Micah when he is older. Hope that my son would have some contact with his first mom, as we know that is what is best for him.

Reading it now, I am sad because that hope is gone. We were unable to meet Micah's Ethiopian mom in Ethiopia, and now CIS regulations have made it clear that continued contact with birth parents is not allowed. I understand the regulation (it has to do with the definition of the word orphan) and will of course comply so as to not jeopardize future adoptions from Ethiopia. But I cannot say that I am not extremely sad about my loss of hope. My loss of hope for my son and his first mother - who cared for him for the first three months of his life and then continued to visit him in the orphanage for the next two months before our adoption was finalized. His Ethiopian mom has felt like a part of our family and I suddenly feel like someone has taken away that family member.

Let it be said that I completely understand that in most IA cases, contact with birth families is not a reality. But, in Ethiopia - it was. (It still is in that an initial meeting is sometimes allowed.) To lose that reality is hard.

Thanks for 'listening.' I couldn't keep it in any longer.


  1. ((((HUGS)))) Stacy. I know the feeling. We weren't able to meet Silas' birth grandmother and it broke my heart. I just have to remember that God is in charge and no matter what Silas will always know how much he is loved by us and his birth family.

    And about the splits - Silas can do them too! We cracked up when he first did them in Ethiopia!

  2. Thanks for sharing your heart. I was very sad when we heard the new regulations, though I understand too why they are doing them. I have to say that I am so impressed with your are such a cake decorator! (If I get one baked and frosted I'm doing VERY well!)